Things that make you go hmmmm...

Those everyday questions that you never thought to ask.

Posted by Paul Whitrow, 8th July, 2008 | Permalink

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway ?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from ?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Stop singing and read on...

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

How do a fool and his money GET together?

Why does Hawaii have interstate highways?

How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?

If a train station is where the train stops, what is a workstation?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

What are Preparation A through Preparation G?

In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

How come there aren't B batteries?

If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail at 1000's of times per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?

How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there?

Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? (still singing it?)

If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?

Crime doesn't pay...does that mean that my job is a crime?

How do they get the deer to cross at the road sign?

How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?

How do you throw away a bin?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8?

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day?

What if the Hokey Pokey IS what its all about?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

Posted on Tuesday 8th July, 2008 at 11:18 am by Paul Whitrow, and filed under Humour